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Ok, I'm gonna call this guy again in about half an hour (one of the people I met with last week). I really hope that I can get ahold of him today.

I am really trying not to get too hopeful about that other job (the one that's in my neighborhood), but it would be really great if that one worked out. I know that I won't hear from that one for at least another week.

ok. weirdness.

I'm sitting here, pretty much in silence, typing away and doing some job hunting... when I hear someone outside yell, quite clearly, "Lauren!"

Now we live on a very quiet street (especially for nyc), and aside from the occasional ambulance (we live near a hospital) and car horn, we don't really hear much from outside.

So I realize that it is pretty damn unlikely that it is anyone referring to me, as I know probably 2 guys in the city and it doesn't sound like either one. I look out the window anyway, out of curiosity, and don't seeing anything odd, but as I walk away from the window I hear it again, loud and clear.

This other Lauren needs to answer this guy, because he's creeping me out.

Other randomness: While I was looking out, I noticed this black cable/rope that is hanging down from somewhere above us, next to out fire escape, then further down, beyond my view. I wonder what it is and why it is there. More importantly, can I snip it? :P Yes, I am bored.

I feel like I could lay in bed, or here on the futon/sofa for a month, just hiding under the blankets. Maybe with a book. Maybe with a pint of Ben & Jerry's. Maybe just with my thoughts.
I'm not sure if it is depression, the change of the seasons, the frustration of the job search, a glitch in my system (my 'girly cycle' is way out of whack again), or all of the above.
This is not making it any easier to accomplish anything.

Oct. 26th, 2005

Got another job rejection in my inbox this morning, if you can call it that. It sounded more like they forgot that they had a listing posted and had already filled the position.

I've been trying to get in touch with one of the people who I spoke with last week. The one who suggested that I call him this week, obviously. He is a difficult man to reach! I keep getting his assistant, who I keep asking for tips on when to try again.

Did I mention that I hate the city? I don't know how it's possible, but this big city is the loneliest place that I have ever been. I keep telling myself that I'll change my mind when I get a job, but that just doesn't seem to be happening.

A couple of people have suggested waitressing in the meantime, which makes sense since that is one job around here that is abundant, but I'm really avoiding that. I'm a klutz and I take things too personally -- not the waitressing type. I would sooner return to my previous job. I keep putting off finding interim part-time work. I am somewhat afraid that I might just give up on the career-level job search if I do that. Part of me is also starting to cling to my cell, here. I rarely leave at this point.

My bank account is now to the point that I can't touch it or I will go below the minimum balance. I can't believe this. Just a few months ago, I had so much saved up. I was paying for Josh's stuff, and that has totally reversed. Now I can't even afford to go visit my family.

The annoying thing is that I am kind of losing faith that I will find something. I have to push myself to search the job listings and type up cover letters.

Halloween plans

Well, it looks like Josh and I were invited to two parties, but in the end they would each cost us $50 a piece, plus the price of our costumes.
One is being thrown at a private room in bar here in the city by a friend of our friend's girlfriend. It is open bar for three hours, and cost $50 per person.
The other is being held at our friends' apartment in Providence. It is free, and would be a group of people that is made up more of our friends. However, it is going to cost us $50 a piece to take the bus there.

As much as we would like to go out and celebrate one of my favorite holidays, we decided to skip both. We could afford it, but we shouldn't really be spending any money right now. So we made some quiet plans to hang out here, carve a pumpkin, roast the seeds, nosh on candy corn, and sip hot cider.

No [faerie] wings this year :(

If I really bugged him, I could get Josh to cave and take me to one of the parties, but I think that would be foolish. Plus, as I have mentioned, I really hate letting Josh pay for my stuff.

If I don't hear good news by next week about the last couple of interviews, I am going to apply for a part-time retail job. At least that will be a sure thing because of the approaching holiday season.

Let there be sight.

Glasses found!
I checked my bag for them again this morning. They apparently had fallen into a hidden pocket, which I don't normally use.
So, it's nice to be able to see, as my eye is still not feeling up to wearing a contact lens.

On a completely different topic, the weather has gotten extra dreary today. Dark, rainy, and windy. Remnants of Wilma are here today, I guess.

the near-sighted chef

Kaja returned my call and it looks like my glasses haven't turned up over there yet, either.

My right eye is burning slightly and has a reddish ring around where my contact lens would be, so putting them back in would be a poor choice. So I've been walking around in a blurry fog since Saturday night.

I guess the only positive to this is that I've been moving along with my reading very quickly because it doesn't require seeing more than a few inches past my nose. Even the text on this laptop looks blurry!

For dinner I threw together something quick with some random ingredients that I had on hand, but it turned out very yummy -- baked acorn squash stuffed with brown rice and curried chickpeas. :)

Geez, how often to I refer to food in here?!

Just a reminder of this important cause.
Please visit *this website* and click to help fund free mammograms.

Thank you, Mandy, for sharing this link!

...back from the second interview ... and it went great! I hope that it really went as well as I think it did. I got along really well with the interviewer. This is the one that is close by (it took me less that 5 mins to walk there) and matches up pretty much exactly with my background. I hope that he agrees.

I was so nervous about this one, but it was not even half as intense as I thought it would be.

He said that he will be hiring in about 1.5 - 2 weeks.

Okay, I still haven't said anything to my parents about this week's interviews.
And I'm trying not to be too hopeful about it.

I know, it is ridiculous to be so superstitious. I can't help it!

The Sunshine and Roses

Ok, I've got to balance that last entry out with some good news.

Next week I have two interviews.

Well, one isn't really an interview. It is meeting with the HR Director to discuss some opportunites that might be available. Their IT dept is not hiring right now because of x, y, and z and they are outsourcing all of that probably until the spring. However, it is for a big company and we are meeting to discuss positions that are more on the communications career track that I might use to get my foot in the door over there.

The other one is for a specific position. The location would be fantastic. I would have no travel expenses because it is so close by. This one is not the big corporate scene, which means that is a more comfortable working environment -- but it also that there is less of a potential to "move up the ladder" because the ladder is shorter. However, the pros of this job completely outweigh the cons. I am going to invest my entire weekend to prepping for that one!!

Keep your fingers crossed for me!

See -- I can be hopeful!!
The icon proves it, right??!